Dear Former Colleagues,
I hope all goes well today at the reunion garden party at Tim's house in Hertfordshire. Unfortunately I am thousands of miles away and cannot attend. But I do have a message here for those who might remember me.
I had a brief minor-character speaking role in the decades-long St. Julian’s soap opera between 1989 and 1991. I was a refugee from two years teaching at a St.Trinian’s-like stage school in London—and then 6 months as a supply teacher, in and around St. Albans. It was in the wake of this that St. Julian’s took me in, sorted me out, and eventually saw me on my way.
My teaching duties included geography, history, and watching children run around muddy fields. My bosses were the deliciously unflappable Kay; the formidable and unfailingly fair and generous Renee; and the gentle, serene, and inspiring Neil – all of whom I still admire to this day, and who turned me into a proper teacher. Or at least tried to.
In September 1991, I took a job overseas, expecting to return to Britain after two or three years, but I never returned. I had always had half a plan in my mind to go overseas once the time was right. And to be honest I was bruised by those brutal 1980s.
The teaching profession was under continuous attack and the fallout from the political point scoring and smearing of its rank and file was too often written on the faces of the children we taught, egged on no doubt by parents steeped in the misanthropic rhetoric of those times.
Many of the grim forecasts - made by disgruntled teachers back then - just seemed to come true in the 1990s with teacher shortages and all the rest. I hope all is better now and that common sense did prevail. Some of my friends who remained in the teaching profession tell me that it did.
I spent my last two years in the motherland surrounded by people who represented Britain at its best and British teachers at their best. Impressive, hard working, caring, thoughtful, funny, substantial people. And I do remember lots of laughter. The solidarity. The pride.
It was from this wholehearted and empowering environment that I eventually set off for foreign climes – the time was right; I was confident, grounded, ready, and with many a regret about having left behind the ever self-regenerating St. Julian’s with its superb cast of characters.
Yours fondly
Adrian
Yogyakarta
July 2018
I am very touch indeed by reading your letter Sir. I am a bit touched to be honest. To leave your old life with your amazing friends and cool places you enjoy living at. But at the same time, it is in out nature to explore. To feel what it is like in different places with different culture. I am not a foreigner in a brand new country so i dont know how that feels like at this very moment, but i guess it must have been nice and groovy at the same time. Here in Jogja, i miss my friends a lot back at home, we used to live together 24/7, eat together, even shower together numerous times. Only if we are in the mood of course lol we aint gay. We just have that taste of brotherhood to the extend of we take care of each other. My food is your food my money is your money my bed is your bed and my struggles are your struggles. We laugh at the simplest and most useless of things and we do cry together often. We are boys learning how to be men. It is okay to cry because it is how we grow up. I miss my friends, cant wait to be back home.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really touching letter. I can’t help but feeling amazed and nostalgic at the same time. To leave the comfort of your home and country like that, and go out to other parts of the world as a teacher is really inspiring. Working as one of the noblest profession of them all, you went out here and representing all is good about your country by teaching the kids. But at the same time, you can’t help but feeling a bit nostalgic when remembering the good old days. I know how that feels, missing the people who made you feel like you belong in this world. Man, can’t say that I don’t miss my friends from back home though. We use to laugh at every single thing that happened. They became my sole reason for going to school, and my sole reason to become successful both in the university and in the future. All my friends are hard workers. I promised to them that when I do come back, I will be a better man than I was back then. And I promise to carve smiles to everyone in my life, like the smiles we used to have on our faces back then.
ReplyDeleteIt must be very sad to not attending such kind of reunion party as a lot of your fellas were coming and you were not. But this letter is such a sweet deed you have done, well-explaining how your life have been without them. I also have a friend, used to be close with me in the elementary school. We followed each other’s Instagram, knowing each activities as seen on the Instagram Story. Sadly, we have never managed to contact each other unless one is having birthday or getting accomplishments, such as graduating or winning competitions. Technology really helps us, didn’t it? Even though we are far away (she was in Jakarta and I was in Bali), we can still know each other, and at least keep being in contact with each other. But then, they didn’t know how I have been for the past years –not as clear as what you told them in your letter.
ReplyDeleteWhen there is a meeting there must be a farewell. That is a simple concept of the meaning of life. Time is something we cannot avoid, sometimes we feel that time takes everything from our lives. But sometimes we also have to realize that time also helps us in providing beautiful moments in life. After reading this letter I felt that later in the future, I would experience things like this, when I was far from my friends in college and when I got my success later. But what we need to remember is that nostalgia is permissible but don't let the past become our barrier to develop. When the distance separates us, we must know that distance is only about numbers. When the bond with a family is very strong we will not be easily defeated by numbers because we are a family that will not be separated by distance, we must understand each other and remain confident that one day we will be reunited by an extraordinary event
ReplyDeleteReading your letter really makes me feel sad because of you not attending the reunion sir. But I also think that the absence of you in the reunion is because you have a glorious duty that is to teach people. I started to think how the world would’ve been without teacher. It would’ve been a mess because no one could do a thing. As for you that are miles away from your friends, all I could think is the position between me and my high school friends. We used to hangout with each other every weekend. We play together, eat together and also making jokes out of each other. Although the distance between me and my friends is not as far as your position between you and your friends, but I also miss them dearly. Fortunately, later today I’ll be going back to Jakarta for a short amount of time just to say goodbye to two of my friends that are going to attend college in Australia. I really hope that I could say a proper goodbye to them.
ReplyDeleteI'm very touched by your letter, sir. I'm never really good at goodbyes, well I don't think that anyone is but whenever I'm leaving someone or some place like highschool, I rarely cry. I would think 'nah, this won't be the last time we see each other' but deep down I know that I would miss them and all the memories that we shared. Like now, I was one of the few people that didn't cry at my graduation day. I guess a part of me was never really ready to say goodbye and leave my friends, go on our own separate ways. I did not expect that it only took 6 months for me to realize that I'm missing my friends a lot more than I thought I would. Now, I would do anything to turn back time and freeze the happiest moment I shared with them. I really wish you and your friends and also me and my friends could see each other very soon, sir.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading your letter, I could feel the sincerity and the passion you have for teaching. I am both amazed and inspired by how you are living your life doing something you love. I have always wanted, and dreamt of how I want to make a living out of doing something I really love. I have seen several people I know making a living out of something they love, and they seem very content with their lives. They enjoy their lives even if the amount of money they receive for their work is not really that much. I learned from them that there are actually some things in life that money can’t buy. Some people have a lot of money, but still, they are living a very stressful life. I prefer having enough money, as long as me and my family are happy. I don’t like having too much pressure. Therefore, I would want to do something I love for a living, regardless of the amount of money I would receive.
ReplyDeleteReading this letter has made me feel fond of old friends, both recent and long forgotten. I would like to make a letter to old friends as well, if I’m sure they will receive it. I would probably like to write a letter for them if they would hold some sort of reunion; but chances are that anything recent will be met by static silence from me, because I would be too lazy to write said letter. Most of my old friends don’t live that far from me, Semarang is just three hours away. If I were to truly write a letter for old friends, it would be to my childhood friends; those in which I haven’t met in over a decade. That way, I would know that it would be worth it. It means a lot to hear from someone you haven’t met in a long time. But there is the underlying fear that what if you’re so called friend might not remember you. It happened a few times with me, not knowing if what I just heard from is from a complete stranger or not. The thing about people from your distant past is that you remember their faces, not necessarily their names.
ReplyDeleteThe letter made me realized how dedicated you are as a teacher. I’ve always realized that being a teacher needs to sacrifice lots of time and commitment. After reading this letter, I also recognized the need of a good friend who we can rely on. These days, people have been so focused on themselves that they frequently forget about others. I feel like technology has drifted people apart. Even when we’re in front of our friends, we constantly use our phone and don’t use the time to actually communicate with each other. After being away from my family and friends in Semarang, I feel the urge to always contact them and express how I feel through text messages and phone calls. Those small but meaningful conversations are the ones that made me realized how important those people are to my life and I wouldn’t trade it to anything. To conclude I would like to deliver that communication is crucial and it's is important to remind people that they're important to us.
ReplyDeleteReading your letter reminds me of a story. I have a friend, a really close friend actually. We have been really close since the first day of junior high school. It’s a guy. A tall Balinese good looking guy. We got into the same class for three years in junior high school and became closer day by day. We spent most of our time together back then. After we graduated, we went to different high schools. He went to an international school in BSD while my parents, as always, sent me to another Catholic school in Kemang. At first I thought that was the end of our friendship, but we got closer. We arranged our weekly meeting and sometimes he picked me up at school even though it took a pretty long time for him to reach Kemang from BSD. Another graduation has been passed. I went to a university in Jogja while he chose to take a year-off. I met lots of his friends here in Jogja, and he, himself, introduced me to one of his guy friend. Here is where the story starts.
ReplyDeleteAs I and his guy friend get closer, everything just seems to change. Now I can feel like he’s fading away. I have seen a drastical change in his personality and attitude towards me. He’s not picking up my phone calls, and not even replying any of my messages. I can’t believe I’m saying this but God I miss him so much. I miss almost everything about him. I miss those days when you would spam me with random corny messages that would make me smile or cheer me up. I miss our endless late night talks. I miss the car karaokes. I miss our not so funny jokes. I miss the sound of his car engine and the scent of his car air freshener. I miss his smile. I miss his laugh. It all happened so fast. It went from everything to just nothing. I’m just wondering why. Is it because ‘my-new-friend-that-is-also-your-friend’? Is it you? Or is it me? Oh please, I just need a simple explanation.
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